Relationships thrive on generosity. Fair is not good enough.

If each side is willing to give only as much as the other, it won’t work. A negative spiral of giving less and less will result, because some of what you give is lost in translation. Some words and actions go unnoticed or unappreciated for one reason or another. Because of this “lossiness” of relationships, both sides need to give more than their half to equal a whole.

Generosity is the alternative. Instead of the minimum expectation, give a gift. When both sides feel they are getting more than they deserve, a positive spiral of giving more and more becomes possible. And gratitude is so much more fun than competitive accounting.

Think about a time when someone (person or business) went the extra mile to be generous to you. I’ve experienced a few lately. One was an unexpectedly free meal at a Hyatt. (It’s kind of cool to ask for the check and hear “Oh, you don’t have a check, this one’s on us because we like seeing you in here.”) That’s a lot of goodwill for the cost of a meal.

I experienced this on a higher level through an incredibly generous and meaningful gift of a special watch. It came unexpectedly from a friend who owns a jewelry store. It blew me away. It wasn’t intended in any way as business strategy, it was a personal gift. As I thought about it though, any time I need the best in a jewelry gift, I will turn to that store and I assure you I won’t be haggling about the price!

I want to be generous enough to give more than my half to family, friends, and customers. And I want to have more faith in the power of gratitude.